Just the beginning, not the end

End of one cycle, the beginning of another.  Maybe a new one, maybe one older than Time itself, or even outside of Time.

I did get most of the things on my Christmas list, including many of the intangibles, though not in the forms I intended; always be careful in phrasing.

I finally went back to the doctor as well, since the bronchitis I had earlier this month morphed into a fairly spectacular sinus infection and the cough never went away.  Starting the new year on heavy antibiotics and cough syrup that works isn’t a bad thing, and I do feel quite a lot better.  I’ve taken steps to make a dentist appointment as well, and to actually start therapy.

Yep.  I’m voluntarily looking at therapy.  There’s a block I have that keeps me from letting anyone get close to me emotionally.  It’s never really been an issue before; recent damage seems to have exacerbated it, and to be frank I never really knew anyone I wanted to let close enough without making them fight through the thorny wasteland that is the outskirts of my psyche.  Essentially, I finally found a man worth going into therapy for.  Whether or not things will work out in the end, I don’t know; we’re cautious friends right now.  I just know that this one’s worth not making walk through the gauntlet.

So I’m starting out the new year on track to being healthier, physically and mentally; financially I’m in decent shape, only getting better as things go on.  I can pay rent and bills and groceries on one paycheck with some to spare before child support, which is something I’m very much not used to and very much like.  I’m getting my house taken care of slowly, and the children and I are settling in nicely.  And possibly most importantly, I’m wrapping my head around the concept of being happy.

It’s a good way to start.


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One response to “Just the beginning, not the end”

  1. Glenda says :

    Girl, met that man. Had to chop through & then apply industrial strength Thorn B’Gone! (aka therapy) tothe thorny wasteland to allow him access. I applaud your bravery & the strength I know it took to get HERE. I am so excited to have found your Blog & looking forward to the year I know you have ahead.

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